can I borrow your handkerchief?

Crying is involuntary and it pinches my nose before it begins. All sorts of things can make one cry and it is wonderful to wet a handkerchief or two at times. But recently, it has been a free coupon that I haven't been able to redeem.

Like the afternoon in the Arctic Cathedral church. I was lucky to be there exactly when the church orchestra was practicing on a late Saturday afternoon.  Something about the soaring symphonies makes goosebumps ripple [ music does that to emotionally under-worked non-vegetarians sometimes ]. Maybe I was bit tired, maybe I was rocking on post-PMS blues, maybe I really did want to cry. I wanted to sit there and cry under the white triangular roofs with all my heart.

In anticipation, I was bracing myself for a wonderfully secret hysteria of giddy joy at being able to let music overwhelm the senses when an old Italian couple noisily started to pose and take photos right next to me. They made the whole experience slightly intrusive. I felt like a monkey whose banana had been snatched away by a baboon. I felt raped, almost.

And then there were the seals in the Polaris. I am not an ardent animal lover. The most I can do is cuddle with kittens and pups for 5 minutes. But who knew an aquarium could be just as satisfying? Standing there, near by the pool after discreetly pushing small children to get ahead in the line, watching the bearded seals swim made my eyes water [ and this had nothing to do with animal lover/cruelty wagon]. There was something about being surrounded by children exclaiming or cameras clicking- yet being completely alone. I felt as misplaced as them animals in the water.

But before I had time to wipe any tears, I was suddenly asked to say 'appelsin' [ Norwegian equivalent of saying 'cheese'].

So much for romanticized tear time!


Bloycey said...

I love the goose-bump ripples. I feel sorry for people that don't have that experience. It's nice to be overwhelmed by the world sometimes.

Anonymous said...

So delicate and real. It's almost like i can hear you breathe.

wanderer said...

That anonymous is not me i know better not to go too corny with you
: ) ..